|
yours truly,
xoxoxo.  MohammadHanif |
babble here,
talk all you want. |
companions,
visit them. .Alvin .An .Aiman .Alif .Ayn .Candiee .Dayana .Faekah .Farhan .Fareehah .Faiz .Fern .Fieka .Filiana .Idayu .Mimi .Nad .NurNadiah .Nura .Siti .Shahrul .Shahilah .Sheila .Sofiahh .Suhaira .Syaz .YokeChee ancient times,
gone with the wind. |
something diff
Saturday, September 27, 2008
been lepak-ing a lot with halim and nad. seps, sometimes. its these kind of friends i'm lacking from. no offence to my classmates uh. somehow i'm like in the middle. you want to be a goodie-two-show, you don't "hang out" till late at night den get good results. but, people who "hang out" till late at night, most of them(not all, but most of them) have bad academic results, but they're having fun. haizz. these past few weeks have been my most kecoh-est week. in a sense that i've been going home close to midnight, stayed at esplanade till late, JE till midnight, and i just got home from west coast park. and thanks to these guys, i was able to cope my "outbreak". for the first time in my life i felt like taking up smoking and thoughts of suicide even came across my mind. sounds like a joke huh. haha. oh well, i'm still here. and no, i'm still a ciggie virgin. raye is near, and my job of painting the hall room is near complete. haha. baju kurung bought, capal check, camera checko! haizz. later mak ngah will be dropping by from KL. nt sure whether my mom told her already of my single status. so far, she's like the best, "hip" aunt i've had that actually talk and advise me on my relationship(which i've lost). she told me that in a couple, its good to have either one to be aggressive, of some sort. haizz. unfortunately once i stepped back to mainland, that talk i had was somewhat useless(well at least for nw. it was the longest train ride i've ever had. like double whammy sia. went home from m'sia alone, all alone(no gf). heh. kk, dun think about the past. raye is close and i've got other friends. should not be sad abt the past. past is past, present and future is what matters. god help me find a close friend of the opposite sex quick. amin. hehe. anyhoos, mak ngah is coming with her husband! my pak ngah!!! he has been in the arabs for close to a year i think. sheesh. die balek, tgk, raye m'sia ngan singapore skali ah. haha. i'm expecting this year's raye to be a big one! =)
"everyone's saying different things to me, different things to me" - In The Waiting Line by Zero 7....
very slow, nice tuned music. will up it in my blog and friendster as soon as i get the confirmation email from imeem! heh. the ones already up aren't the version i like. in the meanwhile, check out the live version from youtube.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FwpZi2KkuwM
enjoy, and bubyes...
Type-d by; ♥m.hanif
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anyway, i was placed at Bliss again yesterday. this time it was better because i already know the guys there. i sold three things! haha. two routers and a usb adapter. better than my first day there, which i sold nuts. hopefully my promoting skills would get better. well, to promote is one thing, but you must also know the art of psychoing. you can promote all you want but if they're not convinced, then they wun buy. haha.
i have a couple of things in mywishlist what-i-want-to-buy-list. i need a flashgun for my camera by 22nd november. because hopefully i can cover the '08 batch's prom night. then i want a new handphone. i'm thinking of a htc coz its like cooler in a sense and it runs on windows. i might be able to make some nifty programs and run in on my phone! haha. then i want an ef-s18-200mm lens. same wide angle as my kit lens but better zoom! sheesh. anndd most of all, a ram upgrade for my super duper slow computer..
pfft...
Monday, September 22, 2008
so once its over, you're simply a piece of memory tucked behind. i guess thats how it is.anyway, i was placed at Bliss again yesterday. this time it was better because i already know the guys there. i sold three things! haha. two routers and a usb adapter. better than my first day there, which i sold nuts. hopefully my promoting skills would get better. well, to promote is one thing, but you must also know the art of psychoing. you can promote all you want but if they're not convinced, then they wun buy. haha.
i have a couple of things in my
pfft...
Type-d by; ♥m.hanif
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Dreaming, Visions of You.
Sunday, September 21, 2008
I just woke up from a heart-breaking dream, like the one from P.S. I Love You. The feeling was like as if it was our last day together. You were there with me by my side, we held hands and i managed to give you a last kiss on the cheek. I did something for a while and realised you were gone. It took me some time to realise you were gone. I panicked knowing that this would be the last time I would see you. I tried calling you, but my hands are all panicky. I got the third call correct. A weird dial tone came up, but no one picked up. Just as I was about to call you again, the real world wants me back. Slowly i feel my real body, lying on the bed. My hand was by my ear as if i was holding a handphone. Then reality hit me. It was a dream. The first dream of this kind that I've had. The feeling i had when I woke up just can't be explained. Its like at the end of the dream, it makes me feel I'm all alone. She was never there in the first place. Haizz. isly.
Type-d by; ♥m.hanif
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Tuesday, September 16, 2008
third day into the uncontrollable mind thoughts i've been having. all this for a silly card. i wonder if you're reading this. i don't read yours, so i guess you won't be reading mine. haizz. felt ok a bit last night after chatting to a friend about it. now its back. started the morning with House M.D., thoughts then started coming in. these tv shows never seem to be out of "relationship problems" in them. one about a doctor with a unstable marriage. turns out that the wife is cheating on him. then theres the main character, House, who is somewhat trying to seperate his ex-wife from her current husband. male and female patients having affairs, transferred std to the partners. i guess these things are what brought back those thoughts. day by day, looking at the handphone hoping for an sms. maybe i scared you, disappeared from your life for some time and suddenly wanted to hand you "something". is it? i'm just sad because of how you reacted to me wanting to pass you "something". you don't have to ask him to call me. you really dun want anything to do with me anymore i guess. haizz. seriously, i feel like a psycho typing this out here. i'm just letting things out. i don't want to say this to you directly coz that would seem like i'm stalking you. if you happen to read this, then, ok. if not, ok also. somehow i'd feel better if you're reading this. hmm. make sure you read my email. bb.
Type-d by; ♥m.hanif
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Monday, September 15, 2008
oh god please make this school holiday a fast one. arghhhhh......
Type-d by; ♥m.hanif
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and as a new day arrives, heres something to cheer ME up. british accent is cool too.
and as a new day arrives, heres something to cheer ME up. british accent is cool too.
Type-d by; ♥m.hanif
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All the best to you.
one last post for the day.
Sunday, September 14, 2008
pain. theres two types of pain that i know of. one is caused by your nerves, the other by the thoughts in your mind. in most cases unless you're really sick, the pain caused by your nerves can be cured. it only hurts in one area and most of the time you don't get distracted by it. the other pain on the other hand is different. its the type of feeling that makes you uneasy and easily distracted. you keep thinking of the cause of the pain, again and again. that is why this pain is hard to go away. similarly like cutting a healing cut. as its abt to heal, you cut it again. and it makes your tummy feel different somehow. you get distracted easily and your day is gone. ironically, this "pain" can exist in two form. the other better known counterpart is often there when someone has a crush on someone else. the same uneasy feeling, you keep thinking abt it again and again with that butterflies in the stomach. but they're different in a sense that, if you have a crush, you can let it out and hope the other person has the same feelings for you too. problem solved. well the "pain" don't quite give you any choice. if you're lucky, you have a shoulder to cry on. it helps eases the pain away. but most of the time you're out on your own. you try let it out to that person who used to be that special someone, but they kept quiet. you're left alone, clueless. next thing you know, they've found another partner. as much as you hope certain things will happen for your gain, you also want that special someone to be happy. so now you're back to square one, by yourself.All the best to you.
Type-d by; ♥m.hanif
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where is the love? to be precise, where is true love? i've just been enlightened by a friend on how common break ups are meant to be. an idea of it will be, once a couple breaks up, its history. there will be no sort of relationship between the two of them unless they decide to become friends. if not, they will continue their lives being strangers. i find this sad. not to mention i am sad right now. full commitment to something and it goes away just like that. a double whammy, each treats another as strangers. well in most cases i guess. i mean, if you tell someone you love them thats like a pact. that is supposed to mean something big. or does the word love mean nothing anymore. like a use and throw word. for me whether in a relationship or not, i will remember someone with a good impression on them, and how they've made an impact on my life. and when i tell someone i love them, thats for real. it might be hard to say it out, but for a relationship to end just like that. haizz. at least a closure would be ok. i guess when you have no one, thats when you cry yourself to sleep.
so much for a "friendly gesture", it turned into a threat. life is unfair.
where is the love? to be precise, where is true love? i've just been enlightened by a friend on how common break ups are meant to be. an idea of it will be, once a couple breaks up, its history. there will be no sort of relationship between the two of them unless they decide to become friends. if not, they will continue their lives being strangers. i find this sad. not to mention i am sad right now. full commitment to something and it goes away just like that. a double whammy, each treats another as strangers. well in most cases i guess. i mean, if you tell someone you love them thats like a pact. that is supposed to mean something big. or does the word love mean nothing anymore. like a use and throw word. for me whether in a relationship or not, i will remember someone with a good impression on them, and how they've made an impact on my life. and when i tell someone i love them, thats for real. it might be hard to say it out, but for a relationship to end just like that. haizz. at least a closure would be ok. i guess when you have no one, thats when you cry yourself to sleep.
so much for a "friendly gesture", it turned into a threat. life is unfair.
Type-d by; ♥m.hanif
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do i sound that bad? as if i want to hand you a bomb and mr protective just have to come to the rescue with a phone call. i'm still me, but i guess you've changed? you used to like secrets and surprises. maybe i sound like a stalker huh. hmm. ok, i'm nt d bf anymore, but at least treat me like a friend. haizz. never have i thought i'd be the person on the other line, where the girl wants the bf to take care of. nice one. when your other exs contacted you, you don't go telling me abt it. why must it be this way. why.
do i sound that bad? as if i want to hand you a bomb and mr protective just have to come to the rescue with a phone call. i'm still me, but i guess you've changed? you used to like secrets and surprises. maybe i sound like a stalker huh. hmm. ok, i'm nt d bf anymore, but at least treat me like a friend. haizz. never have i thought i'd be the person on the other line, where the girl wants the bf to take care of. nice one. when your other exs contacted you, you don't go telling me abt it. why must it be this way. why.
Type-d by; ♥m.hanif
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Saturday, September 13, 2008
hmm. i just realised. the blog is like a person, a non-existing person, "whom" i talk out things like what i'm doing right now when one doesn't actually have a specific person to tell/brag/coment on how their day went. hmm. oh well. thank you Belouuuggck.anyway, the first day as a promoter was BORING!!! or was it just the shop i was stationed at. but simply put it that no one needs a promoter in Sim Lim Square lah. i mean, its a tech mall. whoever goes there are most likely to know their things. i didn't sell anything. close to selling, but sold nuts. so my thought that being a promoter is similar to working as a "Retail Sales Associate" is WRONG! taaaatt..... it is somewhat similar, but this time you have to push your product. they don't want assistance or "just browsing". you have to shove your kay-poh ass in and "assist" them even if they just want to browse. sheesh. then you have to keep insisting, ON YOUR PRODUCTS. i wonder why doing so feels awkward. hmm. so anyhoo, i hope next week goes well. btw, i bought this raye card. its black with gold fonts, and the design is neat. yummae.
Type-d by; ♥m.hanif
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Friday, September 12, 2008
just when I think it's over, mr internet have to show me the obvious. to be more precise, mr friendster. never am i at peace.while some people feel good to be single (after a chance at a possible marriage), some just feel empty being one. what a world huh.
Type-d by; ♥m.hanif
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jumped!
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
wohoo.... scored a new promoter job. i went for the "training" just now. and interestingly, i didn't even called the guy up. instead, he called me! haha. hopefully being a promoter is easier compared to at you-know-where. stupid stocks even come during weekends. bad point is that, the brand right, isn't dat known uh eh. haha. its just not known here lah, in singapore, but its been out since i was borned. literally! established in 1989! haha. commission, here i come!!!!
Type-d by; ♥m.hanif
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not funny
Sunday, September 07, 2008
the mother tried to be funny just now while shopping for my baju kurung. "tak beli baju sepasang?" she said. i was pissed lah, and still am. pfft..
Type-d by; ♥m.hanif
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what a dream
Thursday, September 04, 2008
might be a bit too late, but i had a weird dream last night! two different scenarios in one dream. weird dreams but somewhat good dreams. haha. first dream is that i've passed my diploma course! lol. mr ADRIAN CHIA (my sec. school english teacher/class mentor) was in it. somehow, what determines whether i get my diploma or not is my english! haha. thats funny coz theres no english module in SP! yikes. so he had this talk with the principal on whether i should pass or not, he came out of the room then tell me i passed. haha. second dream is LAGI weird but cool. not very clear what happened tough, but this i remember. a sweet girl that caught my attention somehow went to sleep (its not in a room btw). so when she dusn wake up, i placed her inside a plastic box (those which you stuff things into lah) which is on my foldable trolley. haha. then after that, dunno what happened, i went around walking with another girl. not sure who le. one thing i'm puzzled with is how come sometimes when i dream, i dream of faces which i've never seen before. aniwae, both the girls are sweet. then something happened, i opened up the plastic box. then she started waking up. haha. wakakakakaka. she looks angry. haha. fucking dream rite? btw, someone called me for a promoter job! not i call them, HE called ME! haha. nice one. if tings go well, i might be back to work on the next weekend! skali kene funan challenger dah! haha.
Type-d by; ♥m.hanif
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blogging was alrite back then. somehow i got bored blogging until now.
being "my" type of person kinda suck. i like doing many things but never seem to pursue one to the end, of some sort.
haizz....
aniwae, i made a flickr account:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/mohdhanif89
so-called my good shots.
photobucket account still up and running:
http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v517/an3p/
this one is an online album.
albums by the left sidebar
inactive
Monday, September 01, 2008
to blog or not to blog? that is the question.blogging was alrite back then. somehow i got bored blogging until now.
being "my" type of person kinda suck. i like doing many things but never seem to pursue one to the end, of some sort.
haizz....
aniwae, i made a flickr account:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/mohdhanif89
so-called my good shots.
photobucket account still up and running:
http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v517/an3p/
this one is an online album.
albums by the left sidebar